I wrote a whole test on this topic and I encourage you to take it. But if you want rapid enlightenment, feel free to read this little essay on two of the most annoying things customers do at grocery stores.

1) Asking the cashier, "Are you open?"

I know this query seems simple and harmless, but as a cashier, I can say with absolute authority that it's annoying as just about anything you could say. I have spent a good deal of time pondering why I feel like exploding when I hear this question, and here are just a few of the reasons I've come up with:

I am not a door. I know I bear certain resemblance to one, what with the hinges sticking out of my forehead, but the truth is, I'm not one. "I" am physically incapable of being "open." I can be metaphorically open, as in honest and truthful, but customers are not asking me about my level of forthrightness. They're asking me if my checkout lane is open! So why don't they just ask that and save me a lot of grief?

I am also not a robot. Common courtesy dictates that people treat me like a human. And that includes greeting me. Would it kill people to squeeze out a friendly "hello?" Heck, I'll even settle for a polite "Excuse me." But why do people think it's okay to start an interrogation without even trying to catch my attention first?


2) Ask the employees for medical advice.

This is a rampant problem at the organic food store where I work. People seem to think that because we sell foods that are allegedly healthy, we are all experts on what you should eat to be healthy--and what you should eat to cure every health problem in existence. This practice is not only immensely annoying to me, but it's immensely stupid on the part of the customer. Would you trust a minimum-wage floor-sweeper to plan your diet for you?

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